Totally random thoughts...

Our world is crazy. It's just crazy.

D and I just started looking to buy a house. We decided now's the time since the market will slump probably just a little more and slowly start to pick up. There's a lot of homes for sale in our town and we don't want to leave here. G's in school, Izzy will be in school, and frankly my family is here and we are very happy. So we are just going with the flow. No rush, but today we actually went and looked at a few houses with our trusty Realtor Tom. They say buying a house is one of the most stressful things a person can do. And seriously... I think especially right now, it's just.... it's intense. The amount of foreclosed, bank owned, REO homes, even in a "wealthy" area like where we live are out of control. And going in to these houses and wondering what happened to the family that used to live there, is just bizarre.

And really really sad.

I mean, the first BAD sign was literally just that. A sign posted in the front window saying "NO TRESPASSING!" And giving a list of authorized people to view the home. And then once we got past the front door you see just total turmoil. And as Tom put it, these people are literally yanked out of their house by the police and forced to take whatever they can and not come back. There was furniture left, appliances, clothes, even baby socks. It was so depressing. You could tell from the partially replaced floors and half painted walls when the family must have lost a job, or ran out of money and couldn't afford to continue on finishing their work let alone pay their mortgage. And they just had to up and leave. The house that they had probably lived in for a few years. The house that they probably got a killer loan on a few years back and were only paying interest payments on for a while until their rates got doubled or tripled and they were left with nothing. The house that their kids called "home."

And the bank just came and took it away. And that house, and all the other houses we saw and will see, just sit there. Vacant. No one living there. A family thrown out of their home and forced to go god knows where. For what? For months and months and months of the banks getting no money at all and no one coming to buy up the house that isn't even livable?

I just don't understand why. I just don't get it. Who the hell let this happen to all these people? And why isn't anyone doing anything about it? And it's not even over yet! Trusty Realtor Tom said it's probably going to be 6 more months of sliding house prices. You have got to be kidding me.

Does that Obama really think his stimulus is going to do ANYTHING? Because it's not. And there are going to be more and more defenseless families out on their butts for no reason at all. Because the banks.... are A-holes.

Waiting...

There is nothing worse than waiting. I always lie awake at night wondering if I'm going to get a call that D's been injured at work, or worse. It's a major anxiety thing I have. And often, when G is at her mother's house, I worry about the same things. Don't ask me why, but it's one of those things... if I can't see you in my house and you aren't safely asleep, I worry.

So when D's cell phone rang at 11:30ish I was half asleep and so was he. Then the message alarm went off and woke us both up. We must have known something was wrong. It was G's mom calling leaving a cryptic vague message and of course I'm listening on the other side of his head so I hear "Head," "Emergency Room." EARS PERKING UP! Naturally D calls back and one of the nurses (who we happen to know) picks up G's mom's cell and I can hear more words like "disoriented," "jumped out of a car going maybe 15 mph," "CT scan."

I've never seen my husband move so quickly in his life.

And now I'm waiting. It's nearly an hour later and I'm waiting. Waiting to hear what is happening, more importantly what HAPPENED, and MOST importantly, IS MY KID OK?????

My first instinct was to run out the door with him, but the babies are asleep and I don't want to wake up my mom or get my sister riled up if I don't have to. So I'm wide awake. Shaking. A little. Freaking out, a lot. Praying. I absolutely hate this.