That damn dog!

Izzy: "Mom, why is Oprah sad?"
me: "Because her doggy died hunny."
Izzy: "Awww. That's so sad mommy!"

pause

Izzy with a straight face: "Mom, when's our dog going to die?"
me trying not to laugh: "Baby, Vader will be alive for at least 10 more years."
Izzy: " Oh man! But I want a NEW dog! Are you suuuuuuuure he's going to be alive for that long?"

All I could do was laugh. She hates our dog. And sometimes, I don't blame her! He's just STUPID! And really, it's not his fault! Besides the 6 week 1/2 hour sessions of puppy school where Vader learned to sit and stay (which he does not do well by the way) that's the only training he's had! We begged D to do some hard core training, but procrastinator boy left it up in the air, and I'll be damned if it's going to fall on me to train this thing that I purchased for my husband for father's day two years ago because he HAD to have a Boston, because HIS Bostons were SOOOO well behaved and could pee on command when he was growing up and he INSISTED that it had to be a Boston and and and...

The dog jumps... and I mean like Michael Jordan hops! He could literally jump so high he'd smack D square in the face with his paws. He's like the size of Avery! 20 pounds and maybe as tall as Izzy when he stands on his hind legs! THAT is not cool when there's a 3 year old and a teeny tiny baby meandering about! He barks... not inside thankfully, but if he sees us inside and he's outside, it's barking. Like nonstop. I mean it could go on for HOURS! Bark bark bark! Until we let him in! And then he runs around the couches like ten times in this full on sprinting action and goes completely nuts once inside. Like a lunatic! My dog is psychotic. D's grama thinks that we have some peyote in the back yard that Vader MUST eat to make him such a spaz. I'm starting to think she's on to something!

I love the dog, really. He's a good protector when D's not home. He is very gentle with Avery most of the time. Heck, he even shares his chew toys with her! He tries to play with Izzy and G but they just think he's annoying. I know he needs more attention, but dude, really? The barking, and jumping has GOT to stop!

Someone send the Dog Whisperer to my house!!!!!!!